by Mary
(Midlothian, IL )
My partner and I have been living together for 19 months now. He stopped drinking about 8 months ago on his own. While I thought this was a great accomplishment, I now see patterns of behavior I do not know how to handle. Our fighting has become so serious that he has now moved out. My question is - why do I feel so guilty? I feel like I abandoned him at this very critical time of his life. He is irresponsible, immature and I see now he cannot function on his own.
While I now have serenity back in my home, the guilt I feel is so overwhelming. I feel as though I've abandoned a child left with no defenses.
I'm considering attending a CODA meeting this week as I feel, unconsciously, I became an enabler and I no longer want that role.
I blame myself for this relationship. I initiated it not knowing what price I would pay in the end. I had no idea I was getting involved with an alcoholic as he only drank on weekends after work. I feel foolish that I did not recognize this behavior right from the beginning.
I know this is such a complicated topic but please help me to let go of this guilt.
Thank you so much.
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We have no children or other reasons to stay together. I feel like he couldn't survive on his own though. Why do I care, he just makes me miserable?
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